Bad Touch

I have this really crazy idea that my dogs should be allowed a certain degree of body autonomy. I know this is radical, but stay with me here. Body autonomy is a pretty progressive concept with human children as well, but it's one worth considering. The basic idea is that your body is your own, and you have the right to determine how people touch you.

How does this pertain to dogs? Well, they already think they should have body autonomy. When a dog is uncomfortable with another dog intruding on their space, they make it known through body language by stiffening up, lifting a lip, growling, or maybe even snapping. This is not an attempt to "exert dominance" or "be the boss". It is not "being mean". It's just communication, the only way a dog has to say "I'm not comfortable with that".

Dogs also tell people that they are not comfortable with intrusions into their personal space, or having their bodies handled in certain ways. Unfortunately, most people don't seem to be listening. Many think they are listening, but get the wrong message entirely. So much of canine communication with humans is viewed as disrespect, or bad behavior without any further thought expended on the matter.

I feel extremely lucky to have very sensitive dogs that do a fantastic job of letting me know what they are and aren't cool with. They are also tough as nails and will not back down from a confrontation, so using force to get my way is likely to get both of us injured and/or traumatized. Australian cattle dogs are very mouthy dogs, and Brisbane and Sisci will both gently mouth my hand to let me know when I've reached their limits. If I try to force the issue, they will start nipping and eventually would probably actually bite me. I could overpower them, but that would end with a sad, fearful dog that gives no warning before they bite. 

Of course, it is absolutely necessary to physically handle our dogs sometimes. We have to provide grooming and medical care, and sometimes just move them from one place to another for their own well-being. How do we respect their body autonomy while accomplishing all of that? By simply listening, and asking permission whenever possible before touching a dog that is asking not to be touched.

My dogs and I agree that it's rude to walk up and grab someone with no warning. A lot of dogs have learned that a hand grabbing their collar means bad things, so they stiffen up, back up, or even mouth the grabbing hand. This isn't disrespect, it just means "That's scary, please stop." However, leading a dog via a hand on their collar is very effective when they need to be moved and don't understand where to go. When I handle skittish or mouthy dogs, I make an effort to reach around the bottom or side of their head instead of over the top where they'll find hands threatening. Move slowly, pet their shoulder or chest a little bit, and then gently take the collar and apply the minimum pressure required to get them moving. This says "I know you don't like this so let me show you that it isn't scary and show you what I want you to do."

Likewise, with any sort of touching, I try my best to read body language and respect the signals I see. If a small dog needs to be picked up and gets stiff and growly, I slow down and pet non-threatening areas until they relax a little before trying to scoop them up.

The same idea goes for grooming and handling for medical reasons. When I have a dog on the grooming table for a nail trim, I always talk to them and ask permission to touch. "Can I see your foot?" with a hand running from their shoulder down to their paw instead of just abruptly grabbing their leg. This seems like basic decency, but I see far too many people handling dogs like they have every right to do whatever they like. 

Body autonomy for dogs only goes so far, and ultimately we humans have to do what we have to do. Still, I think we owe it to them to pay attention when they politely tell us they don't like being handled in certain ways. It's our job to help them feel at ease, and teach them via counter-conditioning and just plain respectful handling that it's not so scary after all.

Book Review: Bones Would Rain from the Sky

The full title of this book is If a Dog's Prayers Were Answered...Bones Would Rain from the Sky: Deepening Our Relationships with Dogs by Suzanne Clothier. Right on the cover is a quote by Jane Goodall, "All dog lovers will want to read this book." She's right, this is definitely a book that changed my perspective on my relationship with Brisbane. I love my dog dearly, and I want a relationship with him based on mutual respect and trust, rather than obedience.

Photo by Erin Koski

I had grown up reading about dominance theory, and watched training philosophy change to something that appeared kinder and gentler by comparison. Still, the trainers I talked to on internet communities echoed things that were almost, but not quite, "You must get dominance over your dog. You must be alpha."

Instead, it was "Your dog must see you as the leader, he must respect you. Obedience is a sign of respect." We had thrown dominance theory out the door, and replaced it with a slightly watered-down version I call leadership theory.
People who openly mocked the Dog Whisperer also said that the first step to solving behavior problems was to force the dog to respect the handler by not allowing it on the furniture, not allowing it eat before the handler or walk through doorways first. Some people even made their dogs always walk behind or beside them, never in front, even on leisurely walks. Body harnesses were considered bad because they gave the dog too much freedom to make choices, head halters were the preferred way to attach a leash to a dog, even a dog with spinal issues.

Photo by Erin Koski

Bones Would Rain from the Sky is full of stories about dogs that Suzanne Clothier has worked with, and how they taught her something new. One of the stories that has stayed with me for years after reading the book is about a puppy with a bone in her mouth. The author notes that there were several adult dogs that very much wanted that bone, but as long as the puppy had it in her possession it was hers to keep. The adult dogs would not violate her space or take the bone by force no matter how tempting, because taking resources by force is unacceptably offensive in the dog world. Old-school training theory would tell me that my dog should unquestioning relinquish any resource I demand from him because I am "dominant" or "the leader". Mutual respect says I should not demand that Brisbane give me anything, instead I should teach him that giving me his bone is a fun game. I only ask him for the bone when I have something better to offer. I respect him enough to not break his own social code.

Another Bones Would Rain from the Sky story that has stuck with me was about a foster dog that Suzanne Clothier was working with. Her own dogs don't normally wear collars at home, and she does not lead them around by their collars. This new dog has jumped up on a bed and was guarding it, she went to grab his collar to drag him off the bed and the dog reacted badly. The author realized that she was not treating this dog with the same respect she gave her own dogs, and that day she removed his collar. She taught him how to get off the bed on cue, and taught him what she wanted him to do instead of correcting him for guess wrong or doing what he had always done.

The central point of Bones Would Rain from the Sky is that my dog is an individual with his own emotions and desires. He loves me and wants to be with me, and he wants to do what I want him to do. When he does not obey, it is because I have not taught him what I want, or because he is incapable. He's not ignoring me because he doesn't respect me or see me as a leader, he's ignoring me because he is too stressed to give me his attention, or because I haven't taught him how to successfully ignore squirrels yet. I don't need to correct him and tell him that he is wrong, I need to remind him of what I want, or move him further away from the squirrels until he can focus.

Suzanne Clothier doesn't write that we should spoil our dogs, they should have rules and limits and structure. All she asks is that we view things from the dog's perspective, understand how they learn and what our world looks like to them, so we can work together with a mutual bond of trust. I love Suzanne Clothier's training methods because they not only work, but they feel good. When I use her methods I never feel angry, guilty, sad, or like I'm depriving my dog, or being mean to him.